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Post by M'aiq the Liar on Feb 2, 2008 19:07:23 GMT -5
(Another post for anyone to join.)
It was raining in Leyawiin again. Most of the inhabitants of the city were shut away in their homes. Nary a soul cared to venture out into the wetness. M'aiq was out there; however, he did not believe he had a soul. The Khajiit sold his soul for a bottle of ripely aged Skooma in a trade-off with the madgod Sheogorath. However, little did he know, it had all just been a plain Skooma-induced dream. He did firmly believe that he no longer had a soul though. Sheogorath, meanwhile, didn’t really mind such a thing. He figured it might come in handy later. Perhaps he would need the Khajiit’s soul. Who knew?
Anyway, M’aiq was indeed outside in the rain. He enjoyed it…a lot. So much so that he went about his enjoying without a robe on. The Khajiit wore only his most basic of undergarments as he strode through the town, occasionally swinging himself around torch posts very gaily. At every puddle, he’d make a grand splash and raise his arms up over his head. A soft music was playing in his mind as he danced down the streets. Curiously enough, he was sober.
A young Altmer child peeked his head through the drapes of his home and saw a very wet Khajiit twirling gracefully about the street and asked, “Momma, what’s that Khajiit doing in the rain? I wanna do that!”
The mother looked out the window with an inquisitive look. It was that pesky Khajiit no doubt who constantly provoked the youth of Leyawiin to engage in questionable behavior such as talking to tombstones or painting the backsides of boulders with crushed berries. She shook her head slightly and sighed. Was there no end to his madness?
“No, you stay inside. That crazy Khajiit will probably catch a disease. Hopefully anyway. Then maybe he won’t be such a nuisance anymore.”
“Aw, Mom,” moaned the kid as she pulled the drapes shut.
M’aiq paid little attention to the scorn he received throughout the town because while he had many enemies of this nature he also had many fans. These fans were mostly figments of his overactive imagination, but the important thing was that he enjoyed himself. What could be so wrong about that?
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Crohaven/Varon
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Ta! Come visit again!! Or I'll pluck out your eyes, ha ha ha!!!- Sheogorath, Prince of Madness
Posts: 152
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Post by Crohaven/Varon on Feb 2, 2008 22:58:01 GMT -5
((Oh, what the hell...Here comes Sheay))
It was raining indeed. Such a wonderful day thought Sheay as he was walking through the wet streets of Leyawiin. He was in his best suit as aways and, with his caine in the mud he didn't have a care in the world. That was until he saw a nearly naked khajiit walking through streets like he was.
Oh, what fun this will be thought Sheay as he begain to approach the nearly naked Khajiit.
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Post by M'aiq the Liar on Feb 2, 2008 23:33:26 GMT -5
M'aiq managed to pull off a cartwheel amidst the slippery ground. His footpaws flung mud into the air, and it rained down on him as he stood upright once more. He laughed and continued running in the rain free as a cliff racer. His only hope was that no one from his "family" would see him. What would they think of their Speaker? Probably not much less than they already think of him. M'aiq tends to leave much to be desired when it comes to first and second and third impressions. His fourth impressions tended to be good, or so he thought anyway.
As he prepared to do another cartwheel, M'aiq abruptly ran into a human he hadn't seen previously. He stepped back a bit and glanced at the man. He had on fancy britches, so he must have been some noble type. However, he'd never seen the man around Leyawiin much before. Also, it was odd that a rich human was out in the mud and rain. They hated dirt the most. The Khajiit honestly didn't know what to make of the man.
He asked, "Eh...who is the prey? What does it want?"
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Crohaven/Varon
Full Member
Ta! Come visit again!! Or I'll pluck out your eyes, ha ha ha!!!- Sheogorath, Prince of Madness
Posts: 152
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Post by Crohaven/Varon on Feb 2, 2008 23:45:34 GMT -5
The khajiit was doing cartwheels before his eyes. Sheay was impressed with the khajiit and, he was sure he had seen this particular khajiit before but, he can't seem to remember from where. It was an odd feeling, indeed it was not haveing to remember someone, oh well these things happen. He really didn't care if his suit got wet or not besides, in the end it would dry off. The khajiit was just about to do another cartwheel until he nearly ran into Sheay and, then the same khajiit ask a question that had to be answered.
"I me lad? I am Sheo...Sheay. I'm a banker of sorts and, I have come to enjoy the weather. Isn't it wonderful? ISN'T IT!"
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Post by M'aiq the Liar on Feb 2, 2008 23:54:39 GMT -5
M'aiq cocked his head to the side as he listened to the curious human. He didn't seem normal. His voice was loud, his accent was weird, and he didn't act like regular humans. The Khajiit's ears shifted behind him slightly as he tried to make sense of the perplexing being before him. Perhaps that was it; maybe, like M'aiq himself, he had a lack of sense, a madness. The Khajiit could only guess. Not knowing what to say to him, M'aiq went with the only thing that he could; he spoke his mind.
"You know, for a human, you're kind of weird, Sheay. You talk funny. M'aiq doesn't understand humans enough as it is," he stated with a small sigh. He paused a moment as he thought about what the man had said. He furrowed his brows in confusion as he inquired, "Wait, a banker? What's a banker? You live on a river bank or something?"
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Crohaven/Varon
Full Member
Ta! Come visit again!! Or I'll pluck out your eyes, ha ha ha!!!- Sheogorath, Prince of Madness
Posts: 152
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Post by Crohaven/Varon on Feb 3, 2008 0:07:02 GMT -5
As the khajiit was talking it was out in open(for lack of a better word) that he had a lack of sence considering he was naked at the time. Sheay didn't mind he had seen worse, or made worse for that matter. As the khajiit continued to speak sheay took in account that they both had something in mind. They both had lost their minds. Well, the khajiit did at least Sheay never had any to begin with. When the khajiit had finially finished speaking it was Sheay's turn to talk.
"The banker part is not important but, if you must know. The type of banker that hold either money, minds, sence...Er, I mean money, and coins and, they hold that amount of money/coins in a vault until you say other wise. ALRIGHTY LAD?! Now I am not weird I am ME and you are the one whom is being 'weird'."
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Post by M'aiq the Liar on Feb 3, 2008 0:20:11 GMT -5
M'aiq was thoroughly confused by the banker bit. People gave other people money...to hold? Then, they put it in a vault? Where were these "banker" vaults? Were they as well guarded as the Great House vaults in Vivec? If so, then any chance of M'aiq getting money was impossible. He did love money though. He loved stealing it, too. His ears starting perking back up as he thought about a big room filled to the walls with golden septims, shining in dim candlelight.
He then thought up an amazing idea. Perhaps M'aiq could pretend to be a banker so people would give him money to "hold" for them. It would be brilliant. It was so brilliant M'aiq could never tell a soul about it. Surely, it would get stolen and used right away, ruining everything. Money, it was so wonderful, so--weird? M'aiq's ears shot straight upwards at the word. The man before him was calling M'aiq weird! That was just plain untrue.
Sure, M'aiq was standing outside in nothing but a very scant undergarment, but he wanted to be in the rain and not get his robe wet. It made perfect sense to go out without it. He was clothed, so the guards couldn't do anything.
M'aiq raised a clawed finger as he replied, "M'aiq is not weird. Humans are weird. They wear steel britches and make homes with heavy ceilings and wonder why they fall down on them in their sleep. The Khajiit is perfectly logical. You also talk too loud."
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Crohaven/Varon
Full Member
Ta! Come visit again!! Or I'll pluck out your eyes, ha ha ha!!!- Sheogorath, Prince of Madness
Posts: 152
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Post by Crohaven/Varon on Feb 3, 2008 0:39:05 GMT -5
The conversation was getting fun in the eyes of Sheay if only it could last forever. Thats it before the khajiit dies Sheay will need to take him to his residence so thay may talk for forever...or, at least until Sheay got bored. If Sheay got bored that would mean bad news. Now the khajiit said that Sheay was weird and not him. Not that was poppycock Sheay isn't weird for he is always being himself. The Khajiit is weird for the following reasons: Speaking in third person, being naked in public when it's raining and not being a member of the club. In anycase the conversation is about to get funner.
"I me lad. I am not wierd, you on the other hand are. For I dress fancy in a rain storm and dress cheesey for parties. I'm never loud because I always SPEAK in perfect volume for my voice for I'm ME and, no one else can be me except me, I, and myself...You are weird because you are the one that speaks funny."
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Post by M'aiq the Liar on Feb 3, 2008 1:14:06 GMT -5
The Khajiit furrowed his brows as he listened to the man going on and on. Amidst the talking, M'aiq laid down on the ground in a spot of real soft mud. On his back, he spread out his hands far and wide. He then moved them through the mud, making a certain shape in the mud. He rolled out of it and studied the shape. He'd heard a human child once call it an "angel". However, there seemed nothing angelic about the wonky, obese-looking crater in the mud he'd just created. His backside was now dirty, but he hardly cared. He could wash off in all the puddles. He'd started to do that when the man called him weird for the third time, now dissing the way he spoke.
"You know," said M'aiq as he flicked some mud off of himself, "you keep saying, 'I'm me.' M'aiq thinks that's crazy because, well, who else would you be, you silly human? You cannot be somebody that isn't you. Also, there's nothing odd about speaking in third person when referring to oneself. Why would someone call himself by something that isn't even his name? I? That's not a name. M'aiq is a name. He calls himself M'aiq, so do others."
The Khajiit nodded affirmatively at his own words. It made sense to him. However, things that made sense to someone who lacked sense were probably questionable in the eyes of others.
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Crohaven/Varon
Full Member
Ta! Come visit again!! Or I'll pluck out your eyes, ha ha ha!!!- Sheogorath, Prince of Madness
Posts: 152
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Post by Crohaven/Varon on Feb 3, 2008 21:07:05 GMT -5
As the khajiit was speaking to Sheay, he began to tap his foot in the mud when a merry tune just poped into his head. As the Khajiit continued to speak the music became faster. Then when going along with the music and, listening to the Khajiit at the same time he began to do the 'Irish Jig'. It was raining, there was music and, he was talking to a khajiit, Oh, what a wounderful day this was for Sheay.
Once the Khajiit was done speaking Sheay nodded his head in agreement but, more was still to be said by him.
"I keep saying I am me because I am me and, no one else can be me except for I and myself. For instance you are you and, no one can be you except for yourself. I am not odd nor and I 'weird' as you say I am. I am only being who I am and not myself...EXCEPT, for the ones that claim to be you. However only you can decifer who you are and, not them or they...Do I make any sence? Hmm."
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Post by M'aiq the Liar on Feb 3, 2008 21:40:25 GMT -5
(Ramble, ramble, ramble...)
M’aiq furrowed his brows slightly as the human continued on with his nonsense. He was just adding more human words to what M’aiq had already said. He really had no idea why the man was wasting more of his precious time in the rain. It wouldn’t be raining forever, and M’aiq still needed to go for a swim in the pond to get himself clean. Then, he’d go back to his little home in the sanctuary and sit next to a fire while his Golden Saints massaged his feet. They were really good at that. It almost made up for the fact that they were terrible guardsmen.
M’aiq began nodding his head as the human talked, hoping that if he pretended he were actually listening that the man would stop talking. Sometimes that worked. However, it didn’t this time. He continued to spew more of his human foolery. The white-faced humans were the worst about saying too many words. The ones with steel britches always said the worst kind of words, like prison or fines.
Not bothering to even remotely address anything the crazy man had said, M’aiq inquired, “Does the human want something from M’aiq? He’s a very busy Khajiit and has much to do, so he’d appreciate if you would hurry up.”
M'aiq thought about his plans once again. After M’aiq got a foot massage, he'd need to sit at his desk for an hour stacking pebbles. If he didn’t, well, who would? No one in the sanctuary stacked pebbles. It simply wouldn’t get done if he didn’t do it. Then, he needed to have his Skooma promptly after that so he’d be sober in time to write contracts. Writing contracts while he was still under the influence of Skooma just…never went well. Poor baker and poor dog, thought M’aiq, his mind recalling a contract gone horribly wrong.
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Crohaven/Varon
Full Member
Ta! Come visit again!! Or I'll pluck out your eyes, ha ha ha!!!- Sheogorath, Prince of Madness
Posts: 152
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Post by Crohaven/Varon on Feb 3, 2008 21:51:54 GMT -5
Sheay could tell the khajiit was getting tried of his rambling and his own rambling was making him bored. He hated to be bored so he decided to wrap things up and just go home and talk to Haskil for a while.
"No, I want nothing from you, for I already have it...ENJOY, your rainy day while it last young khajiit for I must be going. You know so much to do in so little time. So, TOODLE LOU!"
With that he was gone from sight in a blink of and eye and, the only thing left of Sheay was his footprints of where he stood. With a voice is the air saying "TA, Come visit me some time! Or, I'll pluck out you eyes, Ha ha!"
(lol)
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Post by M'aiq the Liar on Feb 3, 2008 22:22:26 GMT -5
M’aiq remained in the rain. His feline eyes flicked from side to side curiously. Where’d the weird human go? Did he use magic? Was he even really there? M’aiq furrowed his brows as he thought about it. He couldn’t make up his mind really.
He sat down on the small stone wall that made up part of a planter as he stared at the ground. He was almost certain that he had seen the man. However, he disappeared so suddenly that he had to question himself. Perhaps he was going crazy. Wait, no, that wasn’t possible. M’aiq was already crazy; he knew that. Maybe he was going sane.
He turned to his imaginary brother F’aiq and asked, “F’aiq, do you think M’aiq is going sane?”
F’aiq replied with a vague comment about turtles. M’aiq forgot that he’d imagined his imaginary brother to be very stupid and unhelpful. Why would M’aiq do that? Because he’s crazy, that’s why. See? He’s not sane. Wait, he’s thinking to himself in place of talking to himself! That’s a sign of sanity. By the Nine…
Finally, M’aiq stood up and thought decisively, M’aiq needs to go easy on the Skooma…seriously.
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